Influence vs. Authority – Measuring Your Negotiation Skills
Guest article by Omid G
This is probably the most important negotiation topic there is—and yet, hardly anyone talks about it.
Let me give you some perspective.
Picture yourself as a child again. Your parent tells you not to do something. You ask, “Why?” and they respond, “Because I told you so.” You didn’t like it then—and chances are, you still don’t like it now when people behave that way.
Why?
Because authority is being used to accomplish a negotiation objective.
And that’s exactly what we need to talk about.
The Hidden Paradox in Negotiation
In my 27 years of doing this, the most amazing paradox I’ve uncovered is this:
The more money you spend for your company, the more revered you are as a heavyweight negotiator—yet, the less likely you are to have developed your influence skills, the most important skill in negotiation.
Let that sink in.
How can that be true?
It actually makes perfect sense. When you're spending large sums, the money is doing the work for you. Suppliers are more willing to meet aggressive terms or pricing expectations—not necessarily because of your negotiation skills, but because they want that money.
The more your company spends, the easier the negotiations seem to become. You still get the credit (and often, rightfully so), but make no mistake: it's often the buying power, not your influence, that seals the deal.
All things being equal, a Fortune 1000 negotiator may actually be sharper than one at a Fortune 50.
So, How Good Are You—Really?
Want to test your true negotiation ability?
Quit your job.
Go work for a company with a very small spend—and see how challenging the negotiations become.
The Real Litmus Test: Influence
There’s one test I consider to be the most accurate measure of your influence skills:
If you can get suppliers to align with your procurement objectives—but struggle to gain internal buy-in from end users or business units—then you haven’t truly developed influence.
Why? Because with internal stakeholders, there’s no money to wave around. You can’t rely on authority either—it often doesn’t exist in those cross-functional dynamics.
It’s all on you.
You either influence... or you don’t.
The Firstborn Effect
Ever wonder why the vast majority of CEOs and country heads are firstborn children?
It’s simple. From a young age, firstborns are told to bring their younger siblings in line:
“Make sure your sister gets ready for school.”
“Make sure everyone packs their bags.”
All without being granted any real authority.
They learn influence early—and it serves them for life.
Time for Self-Reflection
Take a long, honest look in the mirror:
Are you truly influencing—or just benefiting from your company’s stature and spending power?
Have you built your negotiation capability around real influence, or have you let that muscle atrophy?
Let me give you the core definition:
Influence means people come on board with your agenda because they want to.
Authority means people come on board because they have to.
The Missing Piece in Negotiation Training
Here’s the root problem:
Most negotiation training focuses only on your own objectives—your agenda, your strategy.
But this doesn’t work in influence-based models.
To influence, you must begin with what keeps the other party awake at night—even if they don’t know it yet. Then, rearchitect your strategy around those needs and wants, while still achieving your goals.
That, my friends, is the art and science of influence in negotiations.
Now go off and do something wonderful.
Be your best,
Omid G.
“THE Godfather of Negotiation Planning”
~ Intel Corp